DEAR BELLA

Dear Bella,

Let me get this out of the way: I hate that I am missing seeing you grow up--I mean up close and personal, not from staring at the photographs posted on Facebook by your Auntie Ree and your Mama Leslie and Grand Birdie, or anyone else privileged to be in your orbit. You are a gravitational pull, Bella. Beautiful and haunting in the way one wants to know someone who is mystery and all out there in front--open, excited, curious. I can see your curiosity in your face, through the shine in your eyes. It makes me curious. I wish I could read a little girl's mind and know how the first time you tasted watermelon really was. It makes me want to know the "first times" of my own life. 

Bella, one day you will ask about your "real family," as if those of us who are your chosen aunts and uncles, cousins, grandparents, and all are not "real family." You won't mean it to hurt us, and if we're kind to ourselves and to you, we will take no offense. I write this for that day: WE, all of us, are as REAL as family comes. You could be no more loved if "love" could be packaged and fed into your heart and soul intravenously. One day, you will know this truth at the core of your being. I hope I will be there to see when the recognition of it lights your eyes and makes you laugh with joy. That will be the gift we all await.

With Deep Desire,
Your Auntie Valerie

Valerie Bridgeman
© September 19, 2013